By Yari

As we have seen with the Catholic priest scandal, a career as a spiritual teacher may be very attractive to sexual predators. Women have approached me distraught over spiritual teachers they had sexual relations with. I am assuming for the purpose of this article that the teacher is a male--I just haven't found that women teachers have a habit of seducing their students. I did hear of just one case where this was supposedly happening, so if this is the case then the same points apply.

The women who spoke to me each had a short-lived affair with their teacher and were then rejected for another women or for several other women. They felt ripped-off and energetically depleted. If you are considering this level of intimacy with your teacher, first try to understand your motivations and the special circumstances that surround a teacher and his group.

Teachers have a certain charisma or they would not be able to attract students in the first place. The more students that they attract, the stronger the energy vortex around them becomes. This is addictive to both the teacher and to the students. This magnetism can help you make spiritual progress, but it can also make it much easier for the teacher to seduce or manipulate his students. The teacher will not find it as easy to attract someone from outside the group. It is always easier to seduce someone who looks up to you as a leader.

There is a certain inequality in this type of sexually intimate relationship that makes the teacher feel powerful. It is a relationship where someone (the weaker) is conquered by the magnetic qualities of the stronger one. It is very much a predatory type of relationship because the partners are not on a socially equal footing within the group. For someone with a "bad boy complex" predatory affairs are extremely sexually arousing. In the same way some people find sex with children or other people's partners arousing. The teacher may imply that he is choosing you as a partner because he sees your spiritual potential and wants some sort of tantric relationship with you for your mutual spiritual development. This is probably not at all the case. Don't let your ego fool you about this. If it were true, he would marry you and establish a committed, loyal relationship with you.

Try to reflect on the reason you first came to this teacher. Did you come for spiritual teachings or did you come for sex? Once I heard a woman say, "if I have sex with my teacher it will speed up my spiritual process." I propose the opposite is true. You can use the energy of attraction and love to progress spiritually, but once the relationship is consummated sexually, that particular type of valuable energy generated from attraction, will never be accessible to you again with that person. There is immense power in the energy of unconsummated love.

I have heard cases where the teacher proposes that his sacred semen will bring the student closer to god or enlightenment. Any teacher who proposes such a thing is not enlightened. Don't let him bluff you into believing he is getting off for your sake. Ask yourself if the Dalai Lama would behave this way.

If you didn't go to the teacher for spiritual teachings, if you just saw him and thought, "I am going to seduce him" and your whole relationship centers on your trying to seduce him, well this is a totally different situation. It is similar to girls who try to seduce rock stars. If this is your situation then ask yourself why you are doing it. Will having sex with this person make you feel more important? Do you think people will look up to you because the subject of their adoration is having sex with you? Just know that his appreciation of you will probably be short-lived and you will likely be looked at with a certain disdain rather than as someone special by both him and the rest of the group.

When you have sex with a spiritual teacher (or anyone) you are creating an energetic link that does not go away. And the energy will naturally flow to the stronger of the two. A knowledgable predator can suck your energy like sucking juice from a straw, but it can even happen unintentionally. This can cause you to fall into despondency and can lead you to a breakdown or even suicide. It will certainly not aid in your spiritual development. Your spiritual development has a lot to do with becoming more independent--less needy. It has to do with developing the links to Spirit that will provide you with your soul needs. Obsession over a teacher, or obsession over anyone or anything, will hinder this development. That is why spiritual practitioners may choose to forego sex and significant-other-type relationships all together.

If you have had sex with a teacher and you find yourself in a less than desirable mental and emotional state over it, there are things you can do. First understand your weakness that caused you to do this. Recapitulate the situation and pull your energy back from it. Then find someone to help you cut the energetic bonds. It will certainly take leaving the teacher in question and probably take many intensive rituals where you focus your intent on breaking this bond. I suggest rituals that are extremely energetic where you are using every possible means to symbolize this break. This is much more effective than just talking to friends or just visualizing breaking the bond.

If you continue to obsess over this person, then your methods have not worked and you need to keep trying perhaps with different techniques. In any case do not give up and don't get yourself in a similar mess again. Learn from your mistakes.

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